the chesapeake

 of all the places i've been and want to go, nothing calls like the chesapeake bay. for folks who live in central virginia, it's not a place that many frequent or know much about. people here go to buggs island, to smith mountain lake, or the carolina beaches. for us, the chesapeake became a place of solace, adventure, and comfort. it's less of a place to boat for sport, to water ski, or party. it is a slow paced place. nobody gets in much of a hurry for anything, and for those that do nothing but work, go, race, it's the perfect place to quiet the mind. 

i remember as a kid knowing my dad went on his yearly fishing trip with who he lovingly referred to as his brothers. in my little mind, he wasn't far away. maybe he was at the james river. maybe he was all the way at the lake. little did i know how far away he really was, in a part of virginia not many people know about let alone have ever seen. he came back with stories of how they fished, played cards, and got the inevitable sun burns. as i grew older, i learned more about this fabled place with its fickle tides, rich marsh, plentiful wildlife, and likely many stories hiding in the far reaches of the sea side of the shore. 

my first memory of seeing the bay was going all the way to the eastern shore when my uncle moved there with his family. to say i was less than impressed would be an understatement. why did i have to ride all the way past virginia beach, see none of that glorious place, drive over a hella long bridge, and land in a place that time forgot? i was instantly not a fan. why drive over 5 hours to a place with no beach? like what? i thought my uncle must have lost his mind. 

at his funeral, the pastor spoke of the eastern shore being my uncle's paradise. how fitting. what older me understands now is the absolute draw to it. beyond the beauty of it that you have to experience to love, the chesapeake bay is a vast ecosystem that sustains thousands of families, is home to so many lovely people, and the birds. i never get tired of the birds. the beauty draws you in, that's for sure. it is unlike any other place in virginia. where else can you see creeks that are so wide that you can't possibly skip a rock across them like you can in appomattox? where else can you see both sunrises and sunsets so rich that it is like another world? where else can you see graceful rays dance beside floating jellyfish and have squawky osprey overhead? i suppose it is all in the eye of the beholder. 

when i was in middle school or early high school, my mom, dad, and grandparents found their version of paradise in mathews county. it was close enough to go to for a weekend and had ready access to the chesapeake. they settled on a small house with one bathroom, no shower, a sandy washboard road that went on forever, and water access. they set upon fixing up that little cabin and we spent many summers there riding bikes, riding on the boat, exploring the community, crabbing, and fishing. i was a less than enthusiastic participant at first, but i warmed up to that place and found that i loved being there as much as they did. 

when they were able, they invested in waterfront property a little closer to town, left the washboard road behind and built a home there. we had more space, more bathrooms (thank goodness), and a pier. when chris and i started having kids, mom made sure they had their own playroom in the tiny part off of the upstairs bedroom. it was under the eaves in what was supposed to be a closet, but it was like their own wonderland complete with toys, mattresses to sleep on, and a sense of magic. they loved it. 

there was nothing like going down there, sitting on the sun porch watching the creek, exploring the many waterways, seeing birds, and dolphins, and enjoying many fish frys and crab boils. we enjoyed holidays there, watched the kids play and prayed they didn't fall over the edge of the pier, did lots of yard saleing, made many trips to the mathews mercantile, watched the daffodils and azaleas bloom, and enjoyed the very slow pace of life. 

while dad loved fishing and we went as often as we could depending on the tides, wind, and weather; my favorite thing to do was ride and explore. i liked to fish some, but the thought of being out all day with no bathroom was enough to keep me on shore. i still get flack for my lack of using the bucket, but i digress. whilst exploring the many back creeks and the rivers around mathews and gwynn's island, we got to see so much: herons creeping up on their next meal, osprey overhead, the little bufflehead ducks in the winter bobbing up and down, the many fishermen tending their nets, traps, and crab pots, and the dolphins. 

oh the dolphins!! one of my most favorite memories from mathews is this: the summer of 2008 (or maybe 09?), we had the pleasure of a calm night to take a ride to the island with mom and dad. little annie was with us too. mom was in the throes of chemo but was feeling good that trip. we set out to do a joyride. and was it a joy!! once we reached the end of our creek, we started seeing them. dolphins. everywhere! they raced alongside us, playing in our wake. they stayed with us for a long time as we rode along. all of us were in awe. we stayed with them as long as we could, until they were bored of us, or found their next meal. all five of us were so happy. it is one of the best times i ever had there with my family. you would most definitely never experience that at the lake, that's for sure. 

after mom's passing in 2009, dad sold the mathews house and started a new adventure, one much closer to my uncle, on the eastern shore of virginia. same bay, different side. this was a tough change, though not totally unexpected. as a kid, we always heard the best fishing was always "across the bay" which was someplace hard to access from mathews with the unrelenting and unpredictable winds and tides. with a bit of apprehension, we started to visit there. it was never the same as  it was before, but life after loss never is. that said, we have since grown to enjoy our time there. we have enjoyed many nights fishing on the pier for rockfish that were drawn in by the bright lights dad had installed on the pier. i  have enjoyed the plethora of birds including but not limited to blue herons, osprey, white egrets, geese, gulls, and the ever majestic and elusive bald eagle. 

we always looked forward to any time that uncle johnny and aunt sharon would come over on their pontoon. it was common there to use boats to travel--it was much quicker than the many winding roads back and forth. they would often come and treat us to sunset cruises on the chesapeake. johnny had an uncanny handle of the creek and its many quirks. he rarely ran aground and could easily navigate it. it was a marvel to witness. they would also lead us out to the nearby beach where many locals would gather at on the weekend. the kids loved exploring it and i loved time lazing around on the boat and catching up with dad, chris, and johnny. 

as things have changed yet again in our family as things historically do, our time spent on and around the chesapeake will change yet again. i'm at peace with that. the past two trips over were sad with the loss of my beloved uncle, a true champion of the bay as my sister in law so lovingly pointed out. with that loss, dad will prepare to move on from virginia and make florida his permanent home.  and as such, the bay will become less of a constant and more of a treat that we will have to make time for. i could see my brother chris and i taking our families there for weekend trips, but the setting will be different. gone will be the days of sunset cruises, fishing trips, and crab boils. it will become part of whatever we make it now and less of what our parents made it for us. we have been living their dreams, really. perhaps we will create our own traditions with our now adult and mostly adult children. the hope of that sounds pretty darn good at the moment honestly.

still, i find the chesapeake part of who i have become as a person. one part of the rich tapestry that is me, just as any of the other thousand pieces of a very intricate puzzle. it has taught and showed many many things. how to appreciate nature for what it is, how to enjoy a slower pace, how to spend time with the people you love doing little to nothing and still find joy in that. honestly, my chesapeake can be your blue ridge mountains. your buggs island or smith mountain lake. point is, you find your place, either handed down from the people who came before you in your family or you find it with your husband or wife and pass that down to your children. it's a legacy thing. i wonder what my legacy place would be for my child or what it would be for my friends and their children. perhaps it's not one particular place, but more of an idea. the thought of it is fascinating, actually. if you had to name it, what would be your chesapeake bay?

i'm off to dream it up. to dream about that nest of eagles, the tide washing up treasures, the jellyfish floating by, the rockfish on the line and all of the other memories that have flooded my mind over the past few weeks. at the end of the day, those thoughts are some of the most precious ones that i have.